Body abuse and similar pursuits

PUNISHMENTZZZ

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 17:33:18 +0200

If I told anybody else these they probably wouldn't think half were real punishments cos they're personal to me really..

No of days Punishment
1 Jog twice round BBlock in the AFTERNOON (i never jog in the pm, i hate ppl staring cos i live in a small community where everybody knows everybody.. i only ever do it <6:30am
2 Cut your hand made cassette purse in half (HELL NOOOO)
3 Log onto old account (h) and message 'I miss you' to you know who.
4 Give your brother your SNES
5 Delete ur fashion blog
6 Apply yo' mother's orange fake tan.. TO YOUR FACE.. and go out in public the next day (fuck, i'd be the laughing stock for YEARS even after i move away.. i could never come home at xmas ever again)
7 Cut out words 'i know where u live edna' from newspaper letters and post it in that SUPER NICE old lady's letterbox (nooo, i love that old lady.. imagine if they found out i'd done it, oh the shame, oh the prison sentence)
8
9
10 Go into the music store with my secret obsession checkout person wearing those size 10 jeanz that dont fit cos your fucking fat and with unbrushed hair. LOL, dont think i could convince myself to do this for £1000 even
11 Tell the family i'm bulimic (this is another never could i do in a million years) hahaha, i had to check over my shoulder to make sure nobody was watching me type.. aghghghgh
Any other ideas? I'm having troubles thinking up these.

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REWARDZORZZZZ!!111!

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 17:20:08 +0200

No. good days Reward
1 Liq eyeliner
2 Glitter eyeliner
3 x tickets from ticketmasta
4 relient k red apple teee
5
6
7 David and Goliath PJs
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16 Make a set of apple & cinnamon pancakes to take on boat
17 Visit to the local music shop to get a new cd (I'm obsessed with the dude that works there which is why this is the ultimate prize btw,.. i'm not THAT cd deprived).

If you're wondering, there are 17 days maximum possible cos i leave this town in 17 days from now and after that i'm not going to be rewarding.. i'm just clinging to 'it'll be easier in new surroundings, change habits easy in new surroudings, blah blah'.

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Eugh, this is enough to make me puke without shoving the toothbrush down my throat.

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 17:08:34 +0200

*Insert before fat pic here * ... willdolater

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Saturday 30th Aug

Sat, 30 Aug 2008 16:58:33 +0200

Today is the last fucking day, I swear on my life.

Oh, hey you reading this.. you should probably just click the little 'Next Blog -->' tab now, this one is pathetic. It's for personal tracking really, nothing more.

Anyways, some basic info. I have as much excess fat as a whale.. difference is I don't need it to keep warm in icy waters. I'm probably uglier than a whale. I'm especially self consious about my CHUBBY CHEEKS (probably also due to 3 years of hardcore bulimia) and TREE TRUNK THIGHS. -sigh

Today is the 'BEFORE' weigh day and I'm 11st 3 according to my mother's scales. I don't trust them to be honest but they'll be okay for tracking weight change if not actual weight.

Food today: 3am ish - cup-a-soup
4:45am ish - plain tortilla wrap, 3 bourbons, white aero yoghurt (I know, this one was NESTLE plus non-vegan... double evil and i still ate the piece of shit)
2pm ish cup-a-soup, 30-40 bourbons.. i lost count obv but it was 2 family size packs
4pm ish - puke most of the shit into the toilet/sink

You know what's worst of all... today I was actually pretty good compared to average. :S

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